"Last year I attended the Real conference; this was a turning point in my
relationship with God."
Let your faith rise as you read Caroline's story.
Believe in His power, love and concern for your life and for your circumstances too - He is able!
My story
This time last year I was in a really bad place. Although I had a wonderful
family and loving, supportive husband my hearts desire was to have a child. We
had been trying for a baby for three years and I had been diagnosed with
polycystic ovary syndrome. After an operation and countless rounds of failed
medication the doctors told me that my last options were to have a further
operation which may not be successful and to be put on the waiting list for IVF.
We were told that we would have one treatment on the NHS and that we had around
a 30% chance of falling pregnant. True to my husbands character, he stayed
positive, whilst I felt helpless, and depressed. I didn't like the person I had
become as I began to feel resentful and shut myself away. I would avoid friends
who were pregnant or who had young children as I felt that they felt
uncomfortable around me, and although I am ashamed to admit it, it was also to
do with self preservation. As well as this painful issue in my life, my husband
and I were also in debt and this of course was an added pressure.
I have always had faith in God since I was a child although at times i chose to
go my own way and felt that i had detached myself from him. I started attending
the kerith church around this time with my close friend Ruth and through
her, met her brother Andy Jackson who supported us to begin managing our
finances. We have already paid the majority of our debt off and only have a year
left until we are debt free! Meeting the Jacksons truly was a blessing for both
of us!!
Last year I attended the Real conference; this was a turning point in my
relationship with God. I attended a workshop on the power of positive thinking
and started to put some of the strategies I learnt into place. I also read a
story written by a women who had gone through a similar situation to myself and
this really helped me emotionally. I came to realise that i was not in control
of my life but that God loved me and had a plan for me. I wrote down
encouraging verses from the bible and wrote them on post it notes. One verse
really stood out ' knock and the door will opened ask and it shall be given'. I
asked god to grant me the serenity to accept the fact that we may not have a
child and that i needed his support and put him in the driving seat of my life.
From that point on I felt more positive and as though God had lifted my heavy
burden. My attitude started to change and I focussed on my relationship with
god. I felt that God was with me and that he was putting songs into my heart;
even songs from my childhood:
I cast all my cares upon you,
I lay all of my burdens down at your feet and any time I don't know what to do,
I will cast all my cares upon you.
Here I am a year later celebrating the birth of our first child, Luke David
Parker. I went for my pre op at the end of august, my operation was for the
following week. At the appointment they told me that my operation had to be
cancelled and i would have to wait. We conceived that Saturday without any
medical intervention! Luke truly is a gift from God! I thank all my friends at
the kerith for their support and to God for an answer to prayer. He makes all
things beautiful in his time.
Caroline Parker